Yes, I hear crickets.

I have been blog slacker EXTRAORDINAIRE! There has been no good reason. I simply got wrapped up in life... and thankfully, it's been going very well lately. We found out that Baby Boomer is all boy. Barry skipped cloud nine and is sitting happily on cloud 10. I think I'm still in shock over it all, so I'm still just so thrilled to be pregnant every day, that there isn't much room for more excitement:)

Also, we have finally chosen a name... this little guy will be Miles Hensley Boomer. Hensley is my mother's maiden name and the family name of my grandparents that helped raised me. In the end, I let Barry make the final decision, but I can honestly say that I am thrilled with his decision.

We finally got registered, have the baby's room painted, have most of the furniture either bought or in mind... whew. Now we need to actually get the furniture in the room and ready! I am 24 weeks as of tomorrow, so in reality, we are down to at most 16 weeks... and that could vary greatly! Anyway, now that I am over the "who wants to hear about my fears of having a m/c", I will start posting more about our journey.

We have so much to do, so much to learn, and so much to experience. I am SO EXCITED!!

blech.

That's how I feel every day starting at about three pm. That means I am fine and dandy at work... and then feel like I've been hit by a truck once I have me time. I guess it's better than all day sickness! So far, I am queen of the bloat. All of my clothes fit (that's the good part of chubby, lol) but I can tell that they fit differently than before. I'm excited to be over 1/2 way to the magic 12th week. Barry is so cute, he now kisses me and tell me he loves me and then pats my belly and does the same to the kiddo. We still need to decide on what we are going to call this bambino. Our friend, M, calls the baby, "Spartacus", lol... I've been saying spawn! Anyway, so far, so good. I guess the nausea reminds me that something is happening in there!

BIG NEWS!!

So our Dr's appointment on Friday went GREAT!! I can hardly believe this, but the following picture belongs to me:





That blip in the center of the black high heeled shoe area is our baby:) We have a heartbeat and are measuring RIGHT ON TRACK!! We are so in love with that little guy, indescribable.

Our next appointment is on the 28th, and we get to see the baby again, and I get to give buckets of blood. Please say a little prayer, if you're the praying kind... or a positive thought, if you're not!

hope to update soon

I have a very important/invasive DR's appointment on Friday the 15th. Hopefully the dr will give me good news on the TTC front. I do not want to jinx my luck, so no more info will be given until that date. If I get the usual or bad news, I may need to head to the looney bin. Just be aware!!

On another note... FLEETWOOD MAC is this weekend! Doug and I will be partying down in KC! I am so excited I can hardly stand myself... after the show we'll be staying right at the Power and Light District (aka BAR ROW), so that should provide lots of fun and entertainment, too! I haven't been to a real concert in over a year. Loverboy doesn't count, lmfao!! I can only imagine the rockin' awesomeness of FM in concert. I am about to burst with anticipation!!!!!!!!!!

so many DR's appt's, so little information

So, I did a sleep study. That was a blazing success, if you judge success by glued hair and exhaustion. Yep, that's all I got out of it. They did say that I was borderline in all areas. Yes, my O2 levels dropped, I stopped breathing for a few episodes, yadda yadda. That basically means that I'm not a good candidate for a mask, and I am a good candidate for a mask.

I go back 2 weeks to see what else they say, they mentioned another sleep, study. I can't wait:-/

So, now for my latest dildo cam appt. I'm actually taking gonal f this cycle instead of follistim, b/c a wonderful fellow IFer sent me their extras. So far I prefer FS, b/c the FS pen is so frickin' easy. The multiuse GF is a bit of pain. Anyway, I am also doing the menopur, too... b/c that has shown to make my follicles much bigger, along with my E2 level. I went for CD8 today and my E2 is 58, so we've def got a way to go. I'm continuing the same meds, and go back for my next scan Monday. This is my first of the last three cycles before pulling out the big guns. My heart is still holding out for a baby that is created by sex, but my body always has the last say, and sadly, it is winning.

I consider myself lucky that Barry is so easygoing with the whole fiasco. Cox on Demand is more than a TV channel in our house;)

Today is a day of mixed emotions.

No, I'm not pregnant, so those emotions are stagnant.

I have made some amazing friends on this shitty roller coaster called life. Some of the best, ironically, have become my friends and bonded with me over monthly longing, jealousy, bitterness and happiness of the land of infertility. One friend, just found out today that her invitro was a BIG FAT BUST. She is funny, kind, snarky, spunky and honest. She will make a wonderful mother to a very lucky child someday. My heart is breaking for her and her husband. Like most people, she doesn't have the extra cash lying around to do as many IVF's as it takes. She's AMA and didn't stim well. Her two surviving embies didn't turn into her much hoped for twins. I just can't get over how sad I feel for her. It's things like this that make me want to scream and throw a fit. I can only imagine all of the friggin' losers that decided to pee on something today and saw 2 lines.... It should have been her, instead.

Now for the other emotion, happiness and disbelief. 2nd friend, who lost a baby at 20+ weeks, just found out that she expecting. They had given up after the pain of their loss. Decided to go the foster adopt route.... hell, she's not had a BFP in over three years before having her miracle taken from her.... then on the week she planned to throw in the towel, on a whim, she took a test and she discovered she's pregnant. She's scared shitless and thanking the moon and the stars for another chance to bring one home. Please, let this one end on a happy note. It makes the other crap hurt a little bit less.

another cycle, coming to an end.

So today is 11dpo... and I have my hands on whitey. That's the look/name of my latest test. I hate 11 and 12 dpo, b/c as all veteran TTC'ers know, although the box/websites say not to test until 14dpo, most people get a hint of a line by 11 or 12 dpo. My one and only BFP was there on the eve of 10dpo and I even managed to get a digi to read positive on 11dpo.... so I'm assuming, like 99.9% of all of my previous cycles, this one is another bust.

Now I need to make decisions on how many more injects cycles we will do before moving forward. We are switching to military insurance only, come May. That means I will have continued meds coverage, as long as we solemnly swear to do no means of ART with the meds. Yeah, that's the military's way of giving it to the soldiers even when they're NOT on duty, since most couples need at least IUI.

I'm 3 months from 29. Yikes. I expected to be DONE with kids before 30, not trying to figure out why sex doesn't make babies like we were taught in health class. I also know that if we plan to do IVF, the summer would be the best time to do it b/c I wouldn't have to take off work. So, should I do 3 more injects cycles... and then shoot for IVF in July/August? Or should I do another year of injects, b/c of the insurance coverage... and then do IVF June of 2010... as a present for my 30th birthday. Gah, that sounds sad. Hopefully, I won't have to worry about any of this when I get that BEAUTIFUL 2nd line tomorrow....

Yes, I still dream;)